Why am I up at five o'clock ranting about love. Crazy isn't...I felt like I had to get this off my chest. So I was up listening to music and these songs starting playing...that got me thinking. Once upon a time I was madly in love. And how love had me in a very messed up situtaion. My ex-lover who shall remain nameless for now...I just remember how bad I wanted him but at the same time didnt need him. It's funny how you listen to songs and the rappers say they are married to the streets well this was an understatement in my situation. I came second literally (to the streets), I would joke to my friends I wasn't even his mistress but just a jump-off because thats how i truly felt. And it got me on thinking how truly love is selfish. Love will have you render yourself to a person but at the same time won't let you take it back when you know you are in a f-up situation. Its like what they call an indian giver...it will give it all to you and take it back at the wink of an eye. But damn it if I don't miss that feeling I got when he was around. The way he would hold me and tell me everything would get better. I loved hard but in the end love didn't love me back.
Well I'm off to bed and will be officially depressed all day:(
Well I'm off to bed and will be officially depressed all day:(